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Judul
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Berikutnya
 

Berlatih dalam Keheningan & Kerendahan Hati, Bagian 3 dari 4

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Anything you want to ask except for the tent? (Yes, Master: Did You design these?) What’s that for? A pen? (Yes.) (And a torch...) No, these, they sell them outside everywhere. It’s cool, huh? (Yes.) They sell them a long [time] already. I guess they just sell it for you for convenience. So, you can have a torch and... (They gave it to us.) Huh? (They gave them to us.) They gave to you? (Yes.) Oh, this is the gift for this retreat. (Yes.) So, “Ocean Tour,” I guess. Instead of last time,... Yeah, yeah. I remember now. I have so many things I forgot. They told me that normally they make a pendant, for each tour or retreat. This time... (Yes, we got that.) also as well? (Yes!) Let me look! What’s... Then they made too many this time. They told me we don’t need to make these, because what for, and then make a pen, it’s more convenient, or something like that, more useful. And then they still make it. I guess the Korean people make or what. From that retreat? (Yes.) Yeongdong or what? Korea? (Korea, Master.) Korea retreat? (Yes, Master.) (Korea.) Probably the Koreans made this also.

You have everything, don’t you? (Yes.) What do I have? (Us.) Yeah, yeah, as if everybody wants you. Just like the mother ask the kids. The mother: “What do I have from you?” “Us!” Yes, “us kids.” It’s cool. No, I didn’t design that. This was invented a long time [ago] already. It’s convenient. (It is.) You can write and can have a torch. Like you never lose it, because you hang it here and you use it day and night. It’s good. (Yes, it is.) Morning, evening. Forget the torch. And also, [the torch is] bigger and clumsy. And this one you can hang on your tent and read books as well. Hang it in the middle of the tent. Because most of the tents, you cannot hang anything on. And this one is like this. Convenient, huh?

OK, just have a look. Nothing important. And we can go sleep. No? (No!) Sí! No, what else? What else you want to see? What else you want to hear? (A story.) (Anything.) (A story.) What, last time? I’ve run out of stories. What kind of story can I tell you? (Like a mother to the children.) Oh, come on. (Yes!) What kind of children are you? White hair already. I have a lot of grandchildren. So, when people ask me how old I am, it’s difficult to explain. They say, “Do You have children?” I say, “Yes. Yes.” “You have grandchildren?” “Yes. Yes.” “How old are You?” Yeah, it’s cool. I have a lot of grandchildren and children. Anything you want to ask, then I’ll tell you. Otherwise, I don’t have anything. I’ve run out of stories. (Sing songs.) Sing songs! Come on! Come on! Come on! (Yes, please.) (Yes, yes, yes.) No, I can’t. You have many... (“I Will Forever Love You.”) Yeah, you have heard it yesterday. You have all the CDs and videos. I know, but to sing, you have to prepare and feel good.

(I actually have a question.) (Oh, a question.) Just to keep me here, I guess. (Yes.) It better be good. (OK. It’s some more serious question, and not so light. I was just wondering, some sisters and myself, what we’ve experienced on the path is that as we go along, the highs seem to be getting higher and the lows lower.) Who is the higher and higher and who’s lower and lower? (Like the experiences. Just that you are more and more happy, but also sometimes more sad than before ‒ more down. And I was wondering, is this a normal process, or is it just that you have your own lessons to learn? And why do some people have it and other people don’t? This, really high up and down sometimes. Or can you control?) Sometimes only? Sometimes. (Yes, only sometimes, like phases. And I was wondering, can you control this? Or maybe should you meditate more? And the second question is that...) Oh, one thing at a time. (Sorry, yes.) Does it relate together? (Yes, maybe.) OK.

(I was just wondering that I have also experienced sometimes that when I have meditated more, like gone on like a personal kind of retreat, that I actually got worse after that, than I was.) Worse? (Yeah! Like over-meditated or something like that. Is it possible?) Worse like what? How do you get worse? (In the sense that not happy, but actually sad.) Oh! (Yeah.) Really? Are you guys like that? (Well, I have experienced it. I don’t know...) Sad for what reason? (I don’t know. That’s why I’m asking. Is it just something that you need to clear out in yourself?) But do you have reason to be sad or...? (No, no, no. That’s the point. Not sad, I don’t know... Sometimes it’s just this sort of darkness or hopelessness. Not sadness really. Depression... I don’t know.) Depression? (Yes.) Do you have that, guys? (Do others have that as well?) (Yes.) Who? (And it seems to be mainly women have it more than men.) Ah, ah, that’s PMS (Premenstrual syndrome). (What? What? What is it, sorry?) PMS. (No, not only.) No? It’s not PMS? (No, no, no.)

OK. So, what you mean is, you can have a very good experience, but come out feeling sad... (No, maybe there are some months when you feel you are really high, and life is beautiful and you’re flowing along.) Yeah. (And then there comes a time when it’s just darkness, and you feel you are lost in the Universe, and everything is terrible.) Oh, that’s the dark night of the soul. (Yeah?) Yeah. (But so often? All the time?) It is that terrible? (Yes, I’ve had it really bad.) Temporary, of course. It’s the dark night of the soul. (Temporary, only temporary. Sure.) They call it “winter of the soul.” (And it’s normal?) Some people have that. Some people don’t have that. Maybe their meditation balances it out. And sometimes it’s like this: Like you are having... Normally, it’s not a very sun-shining personality, so when you get into meditation, of course you have a very good, good, good, good... So, when you come back, you compare to that good, your already un-sunny personality worsens. You feel worse than before that you...

Before, you don’t know anything better. Every day is dark and gloomy, depressed, and now you know the bliss of Heaven. (Right.) You come back; you don’t want to live in this world anymore. (Yes.) “So, what is all this for?” (Right.) “I have a better life somewhere.” (Yes.) It’s just like if you never knew any goodness in your life, and so you live along all sad, but you didn’t know so bad, until the neighbor moves next to you, and he has a Rolls Royce and he’s happy, and everything else. And then you look at your own life, it feels worse. And then even if he invites you over to his house and lets you see all the splendor of his domain and all the things he spends, and all the things he can afford, you come home, feel worse, even though your situation is the same like before. But at least you have experienced some goodness. But then, that is not enough, because it’s not every day, every moment. So, your life here seems dark. That’s normal to some people.

(After a while, it will equal out?) Yes, you get used to it. (Right.) After a while. (You just learn to handle it.) A habit. Just like sometimes we meditate inside, we see (inner Heavenly) Light so beautiful, and when we open the eyes, the room seems so dark, even though it’s not darker than before, the same sunshine. Just like yesterday, somebody had an experience... They said, “Your Light even covers the Sun.” When they see the Master inside, and the (inner Heavenly) Light, she said, “Even Your Light covers the Sun.” Remember that? Not because the Sun became darker, it’s that the (inner Heavenly) Light is more intense than the Sun. That’s why when they see It, they see the Sun is “darkened.” So, if we have blissfulness, and the higher you go, of course, the low life here seems more [like] garbage to you. That’s how we can lose our attachment for the world. That’s how we can get liberated. It’s good not to be happy about the world at all. It’s good that you have broken out of your illusion and know that the world has nothing for you but darkness. (OK. Thank You, Master.) Anyway, later you’ll have more and more happiness, and it seems you will be oblivious to the darkness outside. You get more meditation, you’ll feel better.

Yes, ma’am? (Yes. I wanted to ask. I was listening to the brothers and sisters yesterday. I’m wondering if there’s anything people outside can do.) I told them they don’t need to do too big of a deal. They’re also very emotional, they stir up all kinds of attention, not careful enough. Therefore, I told them, “OK, meditate two together. No need a big deal, no need a big group, and no need to make noise.” That’s OK. [Lord] Jesus said, “When two or more gather in my name, I’m with them.” So, two is enough. No need two hundred or two… You understand? (Yes.) Anyway, it’s fine. It’s OK. In [Lord] Jesus’ time, people also persecuted Him and His disciples. It’s still the same in many countries, honey. If you think it’s different now, it’s not yet. But it’s already much better. You see? They can come out, five or six hundreds of them. In Thailand, before, they came in many thousands. The government begins to know better. You see them, they understand better maybe. Things will change. Every situation, you have to do accordingly. That’s what I think. Because practicing is inside you, nobody can take it away. No government can forbid you. It’s just outside you have to be quiet. Sometimes we are emotional and stir up a lot of attention. God arranges something. It’s very good already, very good. There are some countries that unfortunately do not have a lot of freedom. But in some countries, even though [there’s] freedom, it’s still restricted. So, this is the world. It’s like that.

Anything else? (Master.) (Master, our original plan was to come on the sixth. But when we bought the flight tickets, they gave us the flight on the sixteenth. Due to Master’s care and help, we could come to Korea to see You as we had planned. On behalf of all initiates, I express our thanks to Master.)

Photo Caption: Who Said Beauty Has To Be in Flowers?

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